The international conference of infidels

It was time again for the big conference. All infidels from the various corners of the world were expected to come. Until now, no one was able to answer the burning question “Who is the real infidel?” The best experts of each religion and belief arrived again to compete with each other to show who is the real infidel. The statements and explanations were clear and logical, and all were based on the holy books of the various religions.

Now, the problem was that none of the experts was willing to acknowledge the superiority of a single belief. For every single expert it was more than clear that he was right while all others were wrong. And indeed, how could it be different with all these infidels by nature? They were all misguided and worshipping the devil without recognizing.

Unfortunately, there were no weapons allowed during the conference. This would have been the easiest solution, – just slaughtering all these infidels like it is written in the holy book. If God wants it this way, then it must be good and right. And these infidels are of less value than the cattle on the pasture. God made the infidels as slaves to serve us but for some unknown reason they don´t understand their position and purpose. Probably, they are just too stupid, as they are also too stupid to understand which the only true religion is.

These were the thoughts which nearly every participant had on his mind during the conference. But there were also others who were more liberate and tolerant, with more compassion, more understanding but nevertheless still infidels in the eyes of all others.

After the brilliant speeches of the experts with all the well-prepared arguments and stunning logic, the atmosphere was emotionally charged. The first hecklers got loud and then the participants started altogether to insult and swear at each other. Fortunately, there were no weapons. But the words hit hard. It was a fascinating mixture of dirty words from all over the world and personal insults in English. Some already called for the holy war as it was time to conquer the world, bringing peace and happiness into all countries. Others called on the devil and hell to engulf all these damned infidels. It was simply fascinating. Only a small group of participants maintained inner peace, just observing all these infantile infidels fighting each other. Indeed, it was the same procedure as every year. No results, just fighting with emotional upset. Stupid infidels!

After the official speeches and the emotional insults, people calmed down and peace was restored. The conference was finished and all parties with their representatives were ready to leave, to go back into their own countries. But the day of departure hasn´t come and so most of the infidels enjoyed another day in the five-star-hotel. In the evening, most of them met by coincidence like every year at the hotel bar to have one or two drinks. The alcohol made them forget about their dispute and infidel status quickly. So, they started talking, laughing, making fun and a lot of stupid things the whole night long. Everyone felt like being in a big family as all have been knowing each other for so long. And if they weren´t infidels, they all could have been friends. So much fun!

Fortunately, the day of departure came, and everyone was suffering from a big hangover. The night was great but now the fight had to continue as there is only one true belief, one true religion. They all knew this truth. With a serious face, expressing their superiority, they all left the hotel, secretly looking forward to meet again at the next conference, celebrating all night long.

Stupid infidels!